THE GIFT OF LISTENING AND BEING PRESENT

One of the most healing gifts is to be seen and heard. When I worked as a Massage Supervisor at a major medical establishment in San Francisco, I had the honor of teaching students to work with patients by the bedside. I have very fond memories of those times as some of the most complete in my life. The basis of my curriculum was not so much how to massage the ill, sick or dying but to be mindful, present and listen in every realm and every sense. Through touch, through listening, through word, through seeing and through the subtle realm they became a silent witness and a sacred space was created for healing to take place.

Time and again the patients’ feedback included as their major healing component, they listened and were present.
The students had amazing breakthroughs, openings and spiritual awakenings. First though they had to learn how to be mindful. I learnt from an amazing teacher called Irene Smith who had worked with the dying for over two decades. Her teacher had been Elizabeth Kubler Ross. I also picked up some good lessons from John Kabat Zinn.

But my biggest teachers were the patients themselves who allowed me to enter into their sacred space to work with them. Following their guidance without trying to impose my will, stuff, agenda onto them I was able to develop a mindfulness practice that often blew me away. It was the ultimate still point, the sweet spot.

I am personally over-whelmed by what I see and hear on a daily basis. Mostly I am shocked at how little we listen and how un-present we are for each other, especially now that we have an addiction to cell phones, computers, speaking, intensity, drama, and email.
There are even people who are unable to listen long enough for you to finish a sentence. Or people who are not listening because they are so keen to get out what they need to say. We have lost the art of truly listening and being present, and in that we have missed the gift of healing moments.

Because I feel so bombarded by the fire of our culture, I too now have to work harder at remembering to be present, and mindful, it is a practice. But when I do I am giving a gift of witnessing and as always when we give of ourselves without an agenda we also receive an amazing gift.
So the art of mindful listening is:
Giving our selves and others bare attention
Slow down
Make eye contact
Turn off the cell phone
Pay attention to your breath
Breathe while listening
Be unconditionally present.
Listen without an agenda
Listen without interrupting
Listen without your stuff wanting to come through
Listen with an open heart
Listen without judgment
I invite you to start practicing right away with your child, partner or co-worker. If you do this daily, you will start to notice a difference, its as potent as the giving of 29 gifts.

"Human communication is about listening and interacting with the reflections of ourselves that come forward in the silence… in the pause." Irene Smith www.everflowing.org