"Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert

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Permalink Reply by Ann Hite on March 19, 2009 at 11:58am

I read this book. I'm looking forward to discussing.

Permalink Reply by Dawn wwt on March 19, 2009 at 6:27pm

i read this book last year and i thought it was excellent. i look forward to this discussion with you all. Hugs, Dawn

Permalink Reply by genuine, wwt, welcomer on March 27, 2009 at 8:54pm

I haven't made my way through the entire book yet, but I already have plenty of things I'd like to bring up for discussion. Since I continue to find myself unable to blog perhaps I'll start putting some time into the book group and discussions instead. I'll begin posting some questions and comments for discussion soon.

Permalink Reply by genuine, wwt, welcomer on March 30, 2009 at 9:42am

Still working on the book but have a couple questions for discussion.

The book is about Elizabeth Gilbert's solitary journey. She wrote that she was looking for "the kind of healing and peace that can only come from solitude." This idea is explored throughout the book ... as she chooses to get a one bedroom of her own even though she can't afford it because she thought it was vital to her survival ... as she chooses to remain celibate for a year...

What is that kind of healing she speaks of and why can it only come from solitude?

Permalink Reply by Dawn wwt on March 30, 2009 at 6:29pm

Genuine - it's been about a year since i read the book so forgive me if the details are a little fuzzy. i know that she had problems with depression and did not want to take antidepressants. i think that what she was talking about was that she had spent most of her life basing her identity on her relationship to others (like her parents or her husband), sort of trying to be who they wanted her to be, instead of getting to know who she really was inside.

Permalink Reply by genuine, wwt, welcomer on March 30, 2009 at 7:15pm

You're right...she had spent a lot of her time basing her identity on others. At one point in the book, she asks herself "I had actively participated in every moment of the creation of this life - so why did I feel like none of it resembled me?" I think she was referring to the way she sort of tried to create the life her husband wanted (and make herself want the things he wanted, like children ... but it didn't work; you can't make yourself want something that you do not really want).

I guess the most likely reason why her healing had to come from solitude is probably because she needed to "find herself" ... sort of get in touch with her inner-self.

Permalink Reply by Dawn wwt on March 30, 2009 at 7:25pm

i think that is something a lot of women can relate to. we are taught to value relationships above all else and a lot of us spend way too much time and energy on things we think we "should" want or things we do for others, and ignore our own needs and desires. then all of a sudden one day we look around and say, "how the heck did i get here?"

Permalink Reply by Pat Halverson on March 30, 2009 at 9:17pm

I just got the book today, and started reading. My thoughts when I read about the apartment, was that she needed to be free of what had tied her to her husband " the house" and learn to be dependent on just herself. I think the being celibate felt neccessary, because if you are in an intimate relationship, it is very hard to just think of your wants or needs or beliefs.

I agree Dawn that a lot of women can relate to How the heck did I get here? Also there is a feeling of not having an identity beyond being someones wife or mother or daughter? A point where when you read follow your dreams, and you think what dreams were those???

Permalink Reply by Pat Halverson on March 31, 2009 at 8:25am

By the way Genuine you are helping me to improve my vocab with this book! I have heard the words sanskrit and hashram before but didn't really know what they were so had to look them up! Have to say though don't think I will be doing any writing in sanskrit anytime in the near future, looks like a tough language to learn!

Permalink Reply by Pat Halverson on March 31, 2009 at 4:06pm

I just got done reading the part about her struggles with depression and meds. I could really relate to the feelings she had. I have battled depression since my 20's and finally after periemnopause hit, started taking meds. It was a struggle to find the right one and right dose.
There are lots of days I wonder if it is neccessary at all.But I have a friend you went off hers abruptly and ended up trying to commit suicide. I also have a family history of depression and don't want my children to feel it is a weakness to take meds. I also have shelves of selp-help books like the author spoke of, which never really proved to be much help.

The part of searching for spiritual connection hits home too. And at times feeling like you have it for a moment and then are left wondering if it was real or tricks of my mind?

Permalink Reply by Dawn wwt on March 31, 2009 at 6:05pm

my husband takes antidepressants, too. it makes a huge difference in him. i guess it would be aggravating to have to take medication every day, but isn't it worth it if it makes your life better? look at it this way - if you had to take heart medicine or insulin, you'd do it without a second thought.

i have been searching for spiritual connection since i was a teenager. i am not sure if i haven't found the right venue yet or if i am just too impatient to stick with anything long enough to get results.

Permalink Reply by genuine, wwt, welcomer on March 31, 2009 at 10:04pm

Yes, Pat, I can relate to the meds part too. Since you were willing to share, I guess I will too.

I've struggled with anxiety and depression. I take a low dose of something that really helps with my anxiety .... I've tried going off of it twice when I think "maybe I don't really need it anymore." Not good. So if it's working ... keep on doing it (not that I like having to take a pill, but it's better than what happens when I don't take it).
I was very reluctant to try medication. Like her I wanted to try everything else first, and med was a last resort. I've read all kinds of self-help books (some were somewhat helpful), I found journaling to help at times, I talked to a counselor (that was OK, but didn't solve the problem), I do connect with God and prayer can sometimes help ....but I needed to combine these with medication because they alone weren't enough.

Back to the book: I really loved how the author made depression and loneliness be "characters." I thought it was creative how "they" "talked" to her ... and I found myself thinking "yeah, that's exactly what depression and loneliness would say." You try to counter with a positive and they come right back at you with another argument for the negative.

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