Day 7 Round 2 Who goes up must come down
Yes, I did mean "who." We all know that despite efforts to be perpetually perky and openly optimistic our smiles sometimes get stuck. Our friends and acquaintances see us as always bouncy and bright and able to weather every storm with cheerfullness and joy! We, on the other hand, know there is a little dark demon inside who sometimes wants to hang out a "nobody home" sign, sometimes for no reason other than we want to take a deep breath and....just....stop....for...a...moment. Full moon time usually brings heightened emotions for me (especially of you're a moon child, Cancer the crab). :)
I have a club pot luck dinner to go to today- to be the mistress of fun and cheer; balloons and tattoos for the kids and silly ice-breaker games for the grownups. Those are things I can do easily, but sometimes the "shining" is harder. Lots of opportunites to give by sharing talents and it will be fun, I'm sure. Still, the full moon, rainy day, Monday, impending doom cloud lingers (and it's none of those- neither full moon, rainy or Monday!)It's too long past monopause to use the "hormone" excuse :) and I guess nothing is really WRONG... life just feels a little lopsided. Ya know?
Some days it almost seems selfish to be happy and celebrating, doesn't it? Floods, earthquakes, famine, the homeless, poverty, cancer, starvation.... so much suffering in this world.
I feel the need to be thankful today, to really look at my blessings. I may be poor of pocket but I am rich with friends and experiences and opportunities to know joy. I need to pray harder today for all those in need and to not take my humble possessions for granted. Surely God and the universe knows I am grateful, but sometimes I need to re-commit myself to being an instrument of good in a fragile world.
This, too, shall pass. I think we are all a bit weary of the relentless heat and the demands on time and resources. We know the need to make the best of things and to keep being a light in a dark world. Sometimes though, even the brightest star among us has to put on the dimmer switch and re-charge.
I will do my best to make it a fun time for everyone, and they won't know anything is wrong. Only I know my "sparkle" switch was stuck, and some time reading blogs and sharing experiences helps immensely!
Thanks for re-charging me, friends!
Comment
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Comment by Lois55 wwt on August 17, 2010 at 4:17pm -
Julie, I am sorry you are having a bad day. I hope the event put some of that sparkle back in your smile. I can only imagine you made so many people happy. You would be so fun to just hang with.Your warmth just reaches out through the computer. Please take care, you may just need to veg for a while and take care of Julie. Hugs to you......
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Comment by Mare on August 17, 2010 at 4:13pm
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Julie, all I can say is your sparkle ALWAYS brightens my day. I love the way you have with words. Your blogs are a joy to read and I look forward to each of them. There is no doubt in my mind that you will shine today and everyone will have a nice time because of the happiness you bring to the event. Have fun!
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Comment by former shelterdweller on August 17, 2010 at 3:41pm -
Hey Julie, your sparkle comes through loud and clear in that blog and I did not catch any tarnish on that shine. It is bright and effervescent with personality, compassion and all the things that make you a very special caring person. Just pleeeease don't tell anyone else that we can't use that hormone thing past menopause........I'd hate to have to switch to bi-polar.........lol.
Hope you have a wonderful time at the potluck.
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Comment by Lefty on August 17, 2010 at 1:01pm -
I always like reading your blog and I tend to find myself attracted to water and earth signs. Funny that you are a water sign too (I'm a scorpio). Don't you feel like your experience is somewhat like Cami's? She wasn't always able to accept the bright happy side either. And yes, I do believe the heat starts to get to people (violence in the local news for example). Hope you make it thru your party and come home to some peaceful down time. All the best!
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Comment by Deb~ Community Manager on August 17, 2010 at 12:05pm -
Oh Julie~ I do know what you mean! Please take care of yourself. Take the time just for you and recharge and brighten that dimmer switch. We love you and need you here girlfriend~ ;o) Need a hug? Here's a bunch! xoxoxo
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